Jealousy Makes You Nasty

I know envy is contrary to virtue and besides that isn't a very attractive attribute.  Whenever I feel the slightest twinge of it, I can literally hear my nephew  say, "Jealousy makes you nasty."  So  I try to put the brakes on, because let's face it...who wants to be nasty?  

I guess I should tell you right away that this blog entry is not going to have anything to do with real estate, so if you want to know what the interest rates are doing or how the local market is, you'll just have to come back later in the week or give me a call.  

 Anyone who knows me,  is definitely aware of  how much I love my career, but also how much I value my family. I have a wonderful husband. I have 2 biological (grown up) kids, 1  (grown up) kid who has been a part of our family for many years, and now my kids have significant others.  I'm not sure how my kids  grew up 'overnight',  but it happened.  I can recall,  like it was yesterday,  getting stressed out about conflicting sports schedules, projects due the next day that were assigned weeks prior, finding out that I had to bake 4 dozen cupcakes at midnight, or that I would need to buy $200 in wrapping paper so my child could jump in a ball pit...(the list goes on and on and many parents will be able to relate). Anyway, seasoned parents would tell me, "Enjoy these moments, because your kids will be grown in the blink of an eye and you'll miss all this."  I would, of course, chalk this up to something erstwhile parents say to make frazzled parents feel better, but now I realize that it is so very true. I  even find myself  saying this very thing to parents with young children. 

I can't go into all the stages and feelings of having your babies grow into adulthood, but I will say that when they start school you miss the baby snuggles.  When they leave elementary school, you miss the handmade art projects.  When they graduate,  you even miss the crazy sports schedules and midnight cupcake baking. When they go away to college, or move to Japan, you miss having them under one  roof.  You also, if you are completely honest with yourself, probably get a tiny bit jealous of people who still get to enjoy all of those things with their young children. 

So many of my friends and associates have younger kids and it seems like lately, everyone I know is having a baby.  Don't get me wrong, I am not consumed with jealousy. On the contrary , I am happy for them and all the things they have to look forward to. I am also getting used to this next chapter of being able to enjoy the company of my adult children without all the responsibilities I had when they were younger.  But I still miss little things....like the art projects. Which brings me to what inspired this entry.....

I came home to find this on the counter. It's a turtle pen holder than was made especially for me in college art class by one of the grown up kids. I didn't make a huge deal over it, but it made me so happy that I may have shed a (happy) tear.  It's  in my home office and whenever I  Iook it I  recall a multitude of priceless memories from years gone but it is also a reminder that I have the best of both worlds in this next chapter with my adult kids. 


I don't have to provide 150 orange slices for the soccer team with 15 minutes notice or dye 5 dozen eggs for an egg hunt, but they will still humor me and do these activities even though they are grown. 


They still come to my birthday parties but now they can also go with me to happy hour. I may not know all the characters  on Paw Patrol and I have no idea what a Hatchimal is, but my kids teach me Japanese culture, introduce me to new music like Bassnectar, and taught me to play the drinking version of Yaniv. 




 I also am lucky enough to attend some birthday parties of my friends' young children and get to go to baby showers so I am not in complete withdrawal.

So, whenever I feel a tiny bit sad that I don't have young kids at home anymore,  I will glance at my turtle pen holder and be thankful I have the best of both worlds. Then I will plan a date night with my husband, see if any of my kids or extended kids want to go to a concert or movie,  or just take off for some Me time without feeling guilty. 



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